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03-28-2008, 05:59 PM
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#1 (permalink) |
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Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Houston, TX
Age: 51
Posts: 677
Gold Bux: 7,281
  
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Dog vs Cat
Excerpts from a Dog's Diary
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing! 9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing! 9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing! 10:30am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing! 12:00pm - Lunch! My favorite thing! 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing! 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing! 5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing! 7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing! 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing! 11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing! Excerpts from a Cat's Diary Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Day 984, I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Bastards! There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage. Day 985, I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now...
__________________
  :flyhigh::flower: :foshizzle:  :nakedangel::hihi: Life is too short for drama & petty things so... laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly. |
    
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03-28-2008, 09:14 PM
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#2 (permalink) |
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Just me
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: College- NY, Home- MA
Age: 21
Posts: 833
Gold Bux: 59,299
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Hahaha so true
__________________
 There's a fine, fine line between a lover and a friend And there's a fine, fine line between reality and pretend ... I guess if someone doesn't love you back, it isn't such a crime, But there's a fine, fine line between love, and a waste of time. ... And I don't have the time to waste on you anymore. I don't think you even know what you're looking for For my own sanity, I've got to close the door, And walk away...
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